Some twenty-two years I faithfully served Idoana enduring peril, poverty, and pestilence in his keep. I dare not describe all the events that transpired all those years, or how I came to this point I find myself at now. The tales of deception, trickery, and betrayal dealt to me widdling me away like a sharp knife stripping away the bark from a young tree’s limb. How often can even the strongest rock stand the beat of the water upon it before it slowly gives way? Though I tried to align myself with strong and auspicious allies, they turned in vain to be impotent at best and destructive agents of the House of Nis at worst. Eventually, I joined with the path of many of my kinsmen in retreating from more public displays of my heritage. I forsook my calling, or what I thought was my calling until message by Idoana Himself betrayed to me the truth. Alone and estranged from my kinsmen and all that I knew I wandered the land. I dare not seek another place with another House for I knew I could not ever remove who I was, despite what I was to become. My journeys took me from the lands of the Sails, through the squalor and putridity of the realm of the Tulug.
At last I came upon the land of Usvat, and took upon myself the minor position of Counter. A Counter is a most minor part to play in this world, being responsible for only the numbering of men and creatures and things. He is a keeper of books and tomes and ledgers, with an endless supply of unnecessary work without design or purpose except to be used by the Sails in their craftiness, or the Torrid to his own means. As a Counter I performed my duties too well and caught the eye of the Torrid. It was not by my design I sought out to gain the attention of the Torrid. For doubtless, after my former experiences, I desired naught, but to live quietly and find my daily sustenance. But the mark of Idoana was upon me and though I hid it upon my flesh, I could not hide it upon my heart and soul. Perhaps this was known to the Torrid. I do not know. Except that I was chosen from among the inhabitants to join the ranks of the Axmen. At first I was unsure, and a small voice within screamed out in pain. How could I have given my life for so many years too the benefit and health of all things in service to Idoana, only now to trade for the power to remove life and hope and peace in service to the Torrid? I sought counsel from others, but knew too well counsel could not be trusted. I have felt the burn of counsel given at the selfish ends of others to extract information or power or control. Nevertheless, it was the counsel of one called “Toot” who urged me to take upon me the power and position through his counsel:
“Think not of it as destroying the hopes or lives of man or creature. Think instead of it as looking for the greater goals of Usvat, and indeed, all things. For in the end, you will have saved many a life through the use of your gifting should you accept it.”
In the end, it was Idoana who made the decision for me. Having betrayed me from my former estate, but placed in me the heart of right and good. I knew well the need for justice in the land. As well did I know, the power of the evil men do. Taking these things into stock, and having no other place to go, I committed myself the apprenticeship and training necessary to become an Axman.